How I start my weekend"- from Kylie Mae
1. Sleep in as late as possible. This really baffles owner at first but then puts them in a sense of amazement and happiness. You can really catch them off guard then.
2. When you finally do awake, startle our slaves person however you think will do the trick (barking, pouncing, snorkeling under the covers with your cold wet nose, chewbacca and sing long songs). However my personal favorite is getting as close to the face as possible and staring the person down until they feel this horrible sensation that someone is watching them and suddenly jolt up paranoid. Any one of those (though affective) is a terrible way to wake up but the last tops the cake and is the most fun.
3. Pretend to look at something out the window as if it made a horrible noise and woke everyone up. Look surprised and innocent that they are awake and joyfully prance down the stairs cause you got our way see your person is awake and proceed to pick up the leash and carry it to said person indicating "take me to the bathroom now". No sense of urgency is needed here as the people of the house know full well that I could just go but I'm nice and I ask permission first. At least in this I hold the power.
4. Take the person of the house outside where it's freezing. Now this is my favorite part, smell every single flower or leaf you can find. I actually really do love this about mornings but seeing your person prance about shivering saying things that don't sound like they are nice words is much more rewarding. Relieve yourself but only a tiny bit so that owner thinks you have done your business as they say blah blah blah good girl blah blah and drag you back in the house.
5. Wait 5 min. Owner will get dressed and come back down stairs. Take owner the leash again. Try not to laugh at the face owners make. See the thought bubble appear above your persons head " Does she really have to go or just wants a walk? If I don't take her this could be an emergency. If I do take her what if she wont go? I really don't want to clean anything up.... It's so cold...oh hell. Fine. " Be patient and look adorable. They may look and act like they don't want to take you but remember who holds the power in this situation.
6. *very important* Drag owner to every bush and plant, tree and snail and anything else that barely moves in sharp fast movements. If your doing this right your owner should cry out or shout words in a raised voice. This is good. If your person however ends up on the ground, ease up on your pace. This does not result in a good chance of you getting a real walk for days if this happens.
7. If you have completed all the steps above, your owner is now fully awake! Success. Chances are you are now on your way for a full walk with your grumbling person.
Note: After getting what you want, give owner some space to regain their mood. Sometimes your person can be cranky for a good part of the day after being awoken in such a way. I generally need a good nap at this point anyway from all my hard work. Depending on my persons mood I'll sometimes go lay back in bed but this in itself results in some work. For whatever reason they insist on making up my nest when they wake up. So with some tucking and un-tucking remake the bed to your liking and settle in for some restful sleep. Picking a nice spot on the floor for a few hours is equally rewarding.
I've taken the liberty to share some pictures of my outing with you to show my success. Enjoy!
Stopping to enjoy the view from our house. Sadly my person won't let me run wild like a banshee down that hill.They keep saying that won't be fun but I'll keep trying.
I think I was here when I was a baby! I love finding new things to explore and re-explore. As long as nothing bites me or scares me mind you.Don't judge.
Saying goodbye to my new friends I made. Wish I could be off leash but all I keep hearing is blah blah blah lost blah blah blah run away blah blah no cookies.
This is the right way to unmake/remake a husky bed. If only they would leave it alone I would not use so much energy. I just don't get why they get so angry. again with the blah blah blah bad dog blah blah oh my god all that hair blah blah. They don't get me or my needs at all.